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I am truly a worshipper of the sun. From lApril to October you can find me at the pool every single day. I am sure a lot of it is just a general enjoyment of water and the sun and warm weather, but I really miss it in the winter. I have read a lot about loving the water so much and I believe that empaths love water. An empath is a person who feels the emotions and issues of other so deeply that it affects them. Empaths will take issues upon themselves as though that problem is theirs. Some people can just listen to others and move on. Empaths don't. We take this into ourselves and adopt it as our own.
This year has been worse than others with seasonal depression in the winter. Some days I have trouble getting out of bed. Some days when I make it out of the bed I transfer to the couch. It is not good. It is not fun. I have no motivation to do anything at all. Sometimes it is at the point that I won't even leave the house to get something that is important that we are out of. I have been able to hide it well just because I have grown children living at home and if I need something, they will pick it up and not think anything about it. I went into a state of mourning in October knowing that pool season is over. Thank goodness that my community leaves the pool open until October. Most places close the pool at Labor Day. I am blessed to have an extra month. My strategy for this year was to soak in the bathtub each day. It helps some but not enough that I was not having issues. I started researching light therapy. There is enough research out there that I was willing to try it. I also researched types of lamps. I ordered mine from Amazon and they have them on sale right now. I sit by my lamp every day while I drink my coffee and it makes a big difference for me. I notice that I am more motivated, get up on time, am energized for my day, and am generally in a more upbeat mood than normal for winter for me. I waited several weeks to recommend light therapy just to see if it really makes a difference for me. Well it does. I leave mine on for about 20 minutes. Sometimes I even wear my sunglasses because they make me happy. I have my lamp sitting. on the end table next to my couch. It is about the size of an iPad mini. Does not have a large footprint in my decor either. The light has three settings of light brightness. The directions say to start small and work up. I was so depressed that I just started on the high setting and noticed a difference right away in my motivation. Now, I look forward to my light time in the same way that I looked forward to going to the pool in the summer. Get you a light. If my symptoms sound like you, then get one. Here is the link to the one I recommend and bought myself. This is an active link and you can order straight from there. Let me know what you think! Make Today the Best Day Ever! Jennifer 
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It is staggering to me how many people in society are struggling with feeling like they are enough. There is debilitating, crushing pressure on all of us to be someone we are not. To wear something that is acceptable, to act a way that is normal, to work a job that is approved, but who is actually the gauge to measure what is acceptable, normal, or approved. I have lived my life trying to fit in. Worth and value to society is one of the hardest concepts to adopt into your everyday thinking and oppressive opinions and expectations are the root of all evil here.
Can you even imagine if we were all just alike? Everyone had blonde straight hair? Everyone was thin? Everyone eats kale salad for lunch? This was not how the world was created. We would have nothing at all to learn in this world if everyone were alike. I have struggled with my weight for my entire life. Menopause has done a real number on my body and I would love not to be fat like I thought I was years ago. I think of all the time I wasted sucking in my belly and trying to look thinner. I am over it. I am tired of trying to fit into the mold that society wants to pour me into and pop me out looking just the way that television would dictate that I should look. Bless us all. How do you accept that you are enough? That is such an illustrious goal and one that many are 6 feet under without ever grasping. It is sad really, to go to your grave still trying to suck in, not just sucking in your gut but sucking in the real us that society does not want. Today is D day. the end. finality. Repeat this after me: I am me. Others can learn from me. I have value, I have worth. I am not the sum of my past. I am my future. I am adorable. Stand in front of the mirror and repeat this until you believe it. Pour into yourself because no one else will. Be like Nike, just do it. Today, may you realize that you are enough with your moles, your belly fat, your double chin, your poor decisions, your job that you hate, your failures and your triumphs. YOU. ARE ENOUGH. Make today the best day ever and go forth and be fabulous! Jennifer |